Some habits make us unhappy. Others reveal unhappiness. Some do both. A healthy society strives to nurture the well-being of its members, because secure, stable people who find satisfaction in life can work together, innovate, adapt to change, and problem-solve effectively.
A country full of miserable, angry people who spend their time blotting out their pain or lashing out at others can cope with almost nothing.

Because unhappiness is stigmatized, it’s very possible for someone to be in denial of their unhappiness even when evidence abounds. Indeed, we are all likely in denial of at least a few habits that actively increase our unhappiness.

Hey, we’ve all done some bad and treated others unfairly. I’m guilty of many myself at one time or another. The point is not to be perfect or eliminate every possible negative action from our lives. Nor is the point to excuse these behaviors, which can often be quite hurtful to others. The point is to recognize and reduce the ways we contribute to our own unhappiness and increase the ways we boost our well-being.

I’m writing about unhappiness for two reasons. The first is because I want to live in a world full of functional people that aren’t committing slow suicide in misery. We are all connected, every single living thing on this planet, so even if we never meet, your well-being affects my own.

The second reason is that if you can recognize the habits of unhappy people for what they are, you can step out of the drama and be far less affected by them. Often the behavior that drives you the most crazy is the one that resonates with you unconsciously. The one you’re in denial about. Yep, you’ve got to look at it. Becoming conscious of a habit is both a necessary and powerful first step towards addressing it.